I haven’t seen your tweets in a while, because I left Twitter, but don’t feel bad that you need it for your job - you would probably be exposed to the opinions of others in other jobs or spaces, and because you are thoughtful, expressive and attuned to the needs of others, this will always be something that you are aware of and that is important to you!
I’m halfway into my first year as a high school teacher, and even though I love my job, I wasn’t prepared for the intensity of hundreds of kids (and coworkers) suddenly having opinions about me! As you say, negative ones can’t just not hurt, but also just the constant feeling of being assessed is exhausting.
I also do believe (have to believe) that there are phases to this feeling, and there will be times where it gets to you, and there will be times where you have an acceptance of/resilience to this part of your job. I hope you have good friends around you to remind you how incomplete the perceptions of strangers on the internet are, and that this letter has released some of those cruel thoughts you have about yourself.
That's such an excellent point about the the feeling of being assessed. I think that might be it exactly! Like I don't know that I want this much feedback! And you're absolutely right about the phases.
deeply appreciated this openness, as i get paralyzed by exactly this ~biweekly. clearly i haven't found anything that works, but one jolt that lessens it is remembering that humans were never meant to have this much interaction on a daily basis. it can be overwhelming whether it's good or bad attention. i try to remind myself that i'm not for everybody, and (crucially) that it's their fault, not mine, that they came across my content anyway. there's plenty out there for them, and i thank god/buddha/allah/whitney houston that i'll never have to burden myself with being what they want.
I love your writing and follow you on all channels! Don’t drink the haterade, all of these people sound ridiculous! Please remember that for every person criticizing you, you have at least two other fans who enjoy your reading! Thank you for your creative output in the world and keep up the good work that helps your readers get through their weekdays!
I think you are brave af and if you ever want a Substack editor who will only ever cheer on your past projects, I’m here!! 🖤
You sound like me, before therapy, which is to say, in the most loving way possible, you are cracking under the pressure of a life that is not supposed to be so stressful!
You are not rudderless, you are a writer, which means you are FEELING this entire goddamn pandemic on different level and ALSO publishing is going to hell in a hand basket. Our livelihoods AND sanity are being threatened, daily. And then there’s THE PLAGUE. Also, no, humans are not supposed to have this much raw interaction and parasocial contracts are a thing! People should not say mean things to you because you create content. That’s a weird social contract!
You are FEELING. We are all on edge. Be kind to yourself, too, love. Also I’m really good at weeding out bad therapists, if you need someone to brainstorm with! 🖤
I haven’t seen your tweets in a while, because I left Twitter, but don’t feel bad that you need it for your job - you would probably be exposed to the opinions of others in other jobs or spaces, and because you are thoughtful, expressive and attuned to the needs of others, this will always be something that you are aware of and that is important to you!
I’m halfway into my first year as a high school teacher, and even though I love my job, I wasn’t prepared for the intensity of hundreds of kids (and coworkers) suddenly having opinions about me! As you say, negative ones can’t just not hurt, but also just the constant feeling of being assessed is exhausting.
I also do believe (have to believe) that there are phases to this feeling, and there will be times where it gets to you, and there will be times where you have an acceptance of/resilience to this part of your job. I hope you have good friends around you to remind you how incomplete the perceptions of strangers on the internet are, and that this letter has released some of those cruel thoughts you have about yourself.
That's such an excellent point about the the feeling of being assessed. I think that might be it exactly! Like I don't know that I want this much feedback! And you're absolutely right about the phases.
deeply appreciated this openness, as i get paralyzed by exactly this ~biweekly. clearly i haven't found anything that works, but one jolt that lessens it is remembering that humans were never meant to have this much interaction on a daily basis. it can be overwhelming whether it's good or bad attention. i try to remind myself that i'm not for everybody, and (crucially) that it's their fault, not mine, that they came across my content anyway. there's plenty out there for them, and i thank god/buddha/allah/whitney houston that i'll never have to burden myself with being what they want.
Yes, absolutely we are not meant to have that much interaction! Yes yes yes!
✨🥂✨
I love your writing and follow you on all channels! Don’t drink the haterade, all of these people sound ridiculous! Please remember that for every person criticizing you, you have at least two other fans who enjoy your reading! Thank you for your creative output in the world and keep up the good work that helps your readers get through their weekdays!
I think you are brave af and if you ever want a Substack editor who will only ever cheer on your past projects, I’m here!! 🖤
You sound like me, before therapy, which is to say, in the most loving way possible, you are cracking under the pressure of a life that is not supposed to be so stressful!
You are not rudderless, you are a writer, which means you are FEELING this entire goddamn pandemic on different level and ALSO publishing is going to hell in a hand basket. Our livelihoods AND sanity are being threatened, daily. And then there’s THE PLAGUE. Also, no, humans are not supposed to have this much raw interaction and parasocial contracts are a thing! People should not say mean things to you because you create content. That’s a weird social contract!
You are FEELING. We are all on edge. Be kind to yourself, too, love. Also I’m really good at weeding out bad therapists, if you need someone to brainstorm with! 🖤